I’m not very confident that I can do many things correctly, and am very pessimistic when it comes to doing things…
I don’t get it..people say to become confident and you will succeed but doesn’t confidence come when you have the ability to succeed?
eg. I think I am a horrible person in the kitchen and dont even think I can chop up things correctly or properly…and it ends up that I cant cut the pieces right or am very slow at doing it while others are already finished and up to doing other tasks.
i had the same problem once. But then one day, i was at a sleepover at my friends house and we were playing all these games that i was sure i couldn’t do. i told my friends that i didn’t feel like playing but they saw through me. they made me play and they promised not to laugh. i ended up winning almost every game. It was pretty funny. Overreacting does nothing and the longer you wait to come out of your shell, the harder it will be.
#1 by Anna Nonamous on November 8th, 2009
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Outlook is part of your problem. If you go into something thinking youll be horrible at it you probably will be. Negativity multiplys when you give it the power to. There must be at least one thing you do reasonably well. Focus there and try to improve. Sometimes lying to yourself helps. Mostly though you need to let go of the badness that you feel. Youre keeping yourself down.
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#2 by James64 on November 8th, 2009
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I definately agree with the previous answer but you really need to ask yourself once in a while "does it matter?". Why would you get worried about something so simple as chopping up things? Unless you are a professional chef and your job depends on it, why does it matter? Maybe this is just me but whenever I do something wrong or make a big screw-up, I tend just to laugh about it. I’m pretty hopeless at cooking and I remember a while ago I was helping to make this casserole dish or something similar. Apparently I have to cut some vegetable very finely but at the time I didn’t realise and I remember cutting up some celery into chunks about and inch thick instead of something that should have been more like the width of a hair, and I just laughed. I just want to be happy in life and if people try to make me feel down about myself, I pity them for it, not myself and feel glad that I am who I am.
Sorry if this didn’t help at all lol, sometimes I go off at weird tangents…
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#3 by Isabella J on November 8th, 2009
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i had the same problem once. But then one day, i was at a sleepover at my friends house and we were playing all these games that i was sure i couldn’t do. i told my friends that i didn’t feel like playing but they saw through me. they made me play and they promised not to laugh. i ended up winning almost every game. It was pretty funny. Overreacting does nothing and the longer you wait to come out of your shell, the harder it will be.
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#4 by gwen r on November 8th, 2009
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Self fulfilling prophecies are a big part of any life. You don’t think you can cut up things correctly… So you make it so…
When I was a street kid who believed trash was the best I could be, I started with two simple principles:
1) Don’t compare. It only confuses things. Stay focused on your own task and don’t worry about where others are.
2) Encourage yourself. You can succeed. Don’t get lost in the illusion that success is a one stop gift. Success is the art of getting up once more than you have fallen. You can do that…
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#5 by ? Mad Luv ? on November 8th, 2009
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Why are you so worried about doing it right? i mean your human your going to screw up even if you practice it! i mean look at pres and the cheif who messed up the oath.. something i’m sure they practice and practice more so when you’ll be stating it infront of MILLIONS…
it’s not if you do something properly or correctly it’s when you mess up you fix it! if you can do that people will respect you..
I like you have felt this way sometimes i get flashback and get down on myself.
i’m slower at things while others are done… even in normal confersations by the time i get "Caught up to speak" they are talking about something else and i don’t know how it got started.. that sucks but you know what it don’t matter.. they still like me.. they still respect me..
http://www.coping.org this site really helped me with self esteem, being a prefectionist, and got me out of depression, gave me confidence and helped me soul search…
great site man!
I think you have acceptence issues too.. it’s common with low confidence..
Don’t be ashamed of who you are.. there is only one of you and you can not tell someone if they are living their life wrong or right only they can.. and they determine that..
dont be so hard on yourself!
Someone likes you a friend cares for you family memebers love you… that’s all you need man..
FYI — choppping up things reminds me of a story…
i was in the kitchen and my mother made a suggestion on how to chop potato’s quicker (when ever someone told me how to do something i felt i was doing it wrong) "why did i just think she was trying to show me what she knows to share her brain, crap i do that all the time my intent isn’t your wrong it’s try this"
anyway! i was cutting them up any ol way. after she made that suggestion i looked at her and said what does it matter mom, i like to be creative doing something i’m frankly not that found of! so i’m making it fun for me!!
i like to be creative (and it’s a great excuse when you feel the need to make an excuse for who you are) but you shouldnt…
Success is what you determine it to be How you get there is also up to you!
Much luck my friend!
Smile …
oh crap almost forgot
this may help…
think of something you do well… something you did alone a painting, a music, a poem, decoration, what ever your talents are.,, something you look at and say wow i did that… (the one without the most well i could of did that better) "should stop that bad talk to youself it will damage your moods"
it does help but please please please don’t expect this to change overnight! and don’t be hard on yourself…
once you find that item take a photo of it or something and keep it with you! when ever your feeling low or not so confident take it out feel that energy you have when you look at that accomplishment… that that engery drive you into a sistuation that your not feeling the best at..
i rambled enough!
good day!
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